QUIT THE JOB FOR MARRIAGE! Fiancé orders his fiancée.
CAREER CONFLICT IN MARRIAGE DECISIONS.
SEVERAL PEOPLE MAY HAVE DIFFERENT OPINION.
MMM- MISTAKES MADE IN MARRIAGES. Discourse 15
(Fixing cracks and dislocations in marriages with Reminisce Umoh).
Hello Reminisce
Please I need your guidance. I love your program and the wisdom God has given you. My name is Juliet. I am a nurse by profession and am based in Port Harcourt. My fiancé is a sailor. He works 4months on the sea and spends one month off in town. He says that he doesn’t want me to be going to work especially night duties whenever he is around and that if I don’t quit the job he will not be able to marry me as planned. I love him and I love my profession as well; I don’t know what to do.
Dear Juliet,
Apologies for replying you late- It’s due to my tight schedule on some issues I have at hand for this festive period. Your case is quit a very simple one. Merging career with marriage is one of the mistakes couples make in marriages and it can break the marriage box. A couple of friends I have spoken with keep saying:
1. “I cannot marry a lady that is a nurse because I don’t want my wife to work at night”.
2. Another says, “I cannot marry a guy that works with any of the Nigerian forces because he can be transferred anytime”.
3. Some other would say, “I cannot marry a lady that is a seamstress because she will sew everything in this world and forget when to go and pick my kids from school; she can even sew on Sunday because they are always loaded with cloths to sew 365days of the year”.
4. Another would say, “I cannot marry a lawyer because any little thing she will quote law and tell me my offense and jurisdiction to threaten me in marriage”.
5. The fifth person would say, “I cannot marry a banker because the only days she will have for my family will be Saturday and Sunday”.
Hmmm… the question is: if everybody keeps saying I cannot marry this, I cannot marry that, who are the people that will marry them? Remember we need all these professions to function in a society within a state. Few days ago I saw a picture of 3 beautiful Nigerian army girls on facebook begging guys not to be afraid of approaching them for marriage and I giggled all day.
So Juliet my dear, you are the right person to decide on this but I will guide you through. There are two things involve: In COURTSHIP, you consider your career first before marriage, but in MARRIAGE, you consider marriage and family first before career. Hahahaha… I know it sounds like a disconcerting news somehow, but don’t be nervous; let me explain in details.
1. IN COURTSHIP: You must consider your career first before taking any marriage decision because no man wants to marry a liability these days, and probably, you wouldn’t want to become one when you marry. Some careers are dreams some people built and developed in many years and epochs from childhood, and you can’t throw it away like that just because you want please a man in marriage. For instance, when a girl is young, she will nurse dreams of becoming a doctor, and eventually secure admission to study medicine, spend seven good years in school with hard mental labour to become a licensed medical doctor; would she just throw away such profession to please a suitor? Or a lawyer that spends many years in university and law school, and she is called to bar, only to be told by a suitor to leave the profession for another petty job, will such a person be pleased? I believe the right suitor will marry your dreams as well so don’t be too forward or desperate.
You can only quit your profession if you see a good prospect in that marriage that is even above what you stand to get in your profession, but you must be careful so that a man won’t deceive you and turn you to a perpetual house wife with qualifications- men are full of signs and wonders these days.
2. IN MARRIAGE: once you have taken the decision there is no going back. That’s why you must decide wisely during courtship. Here your marriage and family comes first. You can sacrifice your career if it troubleshoots your marriage. Your husband’s decision is final. If he says you should quit the job for some good reasons and start up a business you are left with no choice because he is the lord of the ring in marriage. His directive will sure be for good if your marriage began with a good foundation.
So Juliet after reading this my long essay, are you ready to sacrifice your career and marry your fiancé or do you have another compatible suitor in your scale of preference to draw a plan B?
Whatever the case may be you need to try and pray about it and ask God for divine wisdom that surpasses what I offer here in order not to make mistake in marriage. Eternal God that constituted marriage will see you through. Thanks for counting on my expertise.
Best of luck.
MMM- MISTAKES MADE IN MARRIAGES
(All Rights Reserved)
Whatsapp +2348064355781
Reminisce Umoh- Coach.
CAREER CONFLICT IN MARRIAGE DECISIONS.
SEVERAL PEOPLE MAY HAVE DIFFERENT OPINION.
MMM- MISTAKES MADE IN MARRIAGES. Discourse 15
(Fixing cracks and dislocations in marriages with Reminisce Umoh).
Hello Reminisce
Please I need your guidance. I love your program and the wisdom God has given you. My name is Juliet. I am a nurse by profession and am based in Port Harcourt. My fiancé is a sailor. He works 4months on the sea and spends one month off in town. He says that he doesn’t want me to be going to work especially night duties whenever he is around and that if I don’t quit the job he will not be able to marry me as planned. I love him and I love my profession as well; I don’t know what to do.
Dear Juliet,
Apologies for replying you late- It’s due to my tight schedule on some issues I have at hand for this festive period. Your case is quit a very simple one. Merging career with marriage is one of the mistakes couples make in marriages and it can break the marriage box. A couple of friends I have spoken with keep saying:
1. “I cannot marry a lady that is a nurse because I don’t want my wife to work at night”.
2. Another says, “I cannot marry a guy that works with any of the Nigerian forces because he can be transferred anytime”.
3. Some other would say, “I cannot marry a lady that is a seamstress because she will sew everything in this world and forget when to go and pick my kids from school; she can even sew on Sunday because they are always loaded with cloths to sew 365days of the year”.
4. Another would say, “I cannot marry a lawyer because any little thing she will quote law and tell me my offense and jurisdiction to threaten me in marriage”.
5. The fifth person would say, “I cannot marry a banker because the only days she will have for my family will be Saturday and Sunday”.
Hmmm… the question is: if everybody keeps saying I cannot marry this, I cannot marry that, who are the people that will marry them? Remember we need all these professions to function in a society within a state. Few days ago I saw a picture of 3 beautiful Nigerian army girls on facebook begging guys not to be afraid of approaching them for marriage and I giggled all day.
So Juliet my dear, you are the right person to decide on this but I will guide you through. There are two things involve: In COURTSHIP, you consider your career first before marriage, but in MARRIAGE, you consider marriage and family first before career. Hahahaha… I know it sounds like a disconcerting news somehow, but don’t be nervous; let me explain in details.
1. IN COURTSHIP: You must consider your career first before taking any marriage decision because no man wants to marry a liability these days, and probably, you wouldn’t want to become one when you marry. Some careers are dreams some people built and developed in many years and epochs from childhood, and you can’t throw it away like that just because you want please a man in marriage. For instance, when a girl is young, she will nurse dreams of becoming a doctor, and eventually secure admission to study medicine, spend seven good years in school with hard mental labour to become a licensed medical doctor; would she just throw away such profession to please a suitor? Or a lawyer that spends many years in university and law school, and she is called to bar, only to be told by a suitor to leave the profession for another petty job, will such a person be pleased? I believe the right suitor will marry your dreams as well so don’t be too forward or desperate.
You can only quit your profession if you see a good prospect in that marriage that is even above what you stand to get in your profession, but you must be careful so that a man won’t deceive you and turn you to a perpetual house wife with qualifications- men are full of signs and wonders these days.
2. IN MARRIAGE: once you have taken the decision there is no going back. That’s why you must decide wisely during courtship. Here your marriage and family comes first. You can sacrifice your career if it troubleshoots your marriage. Your husband’s decision is final. If he says you should quit the job for some good reasons and start up a business you are left with no choice because he is the lord of the ring in marriage. His directive will sure be for good if your marriage began with a good foundation.
So Juliet after reading this my long essay, are you ready to sacrifice your career and marry your fiancé or do you have another compatible suitor in your scale of preference to draw a plan B?
Whatever the case may be you need to try and pray about it and ask God for divine wisdom that surpasses what I offer here in order not to make mistake in marriage. Eternal God that constituted marriage will see you through. Thanks for counting on my expertise.
Best of luck.
MMM- MISTAKES MADE IN MARRIAGES
(All Rights Reserved)
Whatsapp +2348064355781
Reminisce Umoh- Coach.
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